What Strange Paradise by Omar El Akkad

Author:Omar El Akkad [El Akkad, Omar]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: McClelland & Stewart
Published: 2021-07-20T00:00:00+00:00

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Amir sat back against the railing, a dull pain in his midsection. He turned and tugged slightly on the end of Umm Ibrahim’s niqab.

“What is it, baby?” Umm Ibrahim said.

“I need to pee,” Amir whispered.

Umm Ibrahim looked around the deck. “You can’t hold it?” she asked.

Amir shook his head.

“All right,” Umm Ibrahim said. She stood, wobbling a little as she sought to keep her balance. Awkwardly she shifted around so that she was now standing behind Amir, and Amir faced the railing, overlooking the sea. In the cramped confines of the deck a few neighboring passengers complained as the woman and the boy moved, but Umm Ibrahim ignored them.

“Go ahead,” she told Amir. “Make sure you get it all in the water, not the boat.”

“I can’t go,” Amir said, pointing to the passengers around him, who seemed utterly uninterested in this small spectacle but stared at him anyway because there was nothing else to look at.

Umm Ibrahim sighed. She turned and yelled at Walid.

“Hey, you. Give me your jacket.”

“Huh?”

“Your jacket, your jacket. I need it to cover the boy up. He has to go to the bathroom.”

“So let him go,” Walid replied. “Who the hell cares what he does?”

“Have some decency,” Umm Ibrahim said. “He’s a little boy.”

“So what? Everyone else on this boat has been pissing without covering up.”

Walid pointed at the large orange life jacket in which Amir was encased. “He’s dressed like a man, isn’t he? Let him piss like a man.”

Umm Ibrahim turned to Mohamed. “You want this night to go smoothly?” she said.

Mohamed raised his hands in a calming gesture. “Give her the damn jacket,” he said to Walid. “It’s just for a minute. Come on, be the bigger man.”

“Fine,” Walid said. He pulled the crumpled suit jacket from behind his head and threw it at Umm Ibrahim. It came unfurled midair and floated to rest on the floor midway along the deck between them. Three passengers handed it to one another until it reached Umm Ibrahim. She held it and stood directly behind Amir, covering his lower half in all directions but the one facing the sea.

“There,” she said. “Go on.”

“I can’t reach,” Amir said.

With the help of her immediate neighbor, Umm Ibrahim held Amir up from behind so he was elevated enough for his midsection to rise above the railing. Soon they’d succeeded in giving him the clearance he needed. Clumsily and unable to see what he was doing with the oversize life jacket riding all the way up to his temple, Amir finally relieved himself.

Even though he could barely hear the sprinkle of urine against the sea, there was something reassuring about the sound. Amir could not for the life of him understand why it was so soothing to hear this very faint dribble, which in a way resembled the sound of distant applause, but as the pain receded from his bladder, he felt so much lighter.

As he finished, a large wave collided with the Calypso’s starboard side. The boat rocked and the two passengers holding Amir momentarily lost their grip.

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